Before i kick this off, the rain picture is from Google.. Ha, i do need to take some pictures for my weekly diary but i tend to just take pictures of the ole cat.
This week has gone so quick! I can’t remember what i did on what days. I know that Sunday was the WWE Royal Rumble and it was a huge disappointment! I live in the UK so i stayed up til 4am watching it. I feel as though my body cant take these late nights as much any more, i feel so tired still and i didn’t do anything yesterday (Monday)
My weekend was pretty drab, my partners grandmother is in hospital for over a week now and she had a bad fall on the Friday so we’ve been standing by with our phones.
I was also invited to go out for drinks but i came up with an excuse as you do. (Actually my excuse was legit my mother was supposed to be coming round after work on the Friday but then decided to go straight him, so i didn’t lie massively.)
My invite was from a girl who i was working with at that job that just got rid of me. I’ve been trying to sway away from the after work drinking antics as i think i would just be the odd one out. They all get to moan about the working week and bond whilst i just fake smile and fake laugh. Usually end up being the drunkest because i have nothing to input other than sipping on my beer.
ALSO, i declined because i just wasn’t feeling it. Her antics are not my thing. She’s ‘happily’ married with a child but likes to play around a little bit. I don’t judge her for it, it’s her life and whatever she is up to her. I think because i don’t work with them i just don’t really care any more? I’ve got this huge amount of emptiness inside me at the moment. And i don’t think cheating on my boyfriend is a good idea, i feel guilty sometimes that i used to look at guys in the office.
Getting text messages asking if i am ok from people when i know they aren’t really bothered, especially when people just want to tell me gossip that i have no clue on how to respond. If your cheating and flirting with someone else, do what you feel best because whatever i say goes through one ear.
I’ve been trying more crochet stitches as i am getting bored with my current projects. I do need to complete them as one is for a customer but i just feel like i need to keep occupied all the time. So i got some Tunisian hooks and knitting needles and giving myself some lessons on this. I threw the knitting needles on the floor, REALLY frustrating. I’ll keep at it as i don’t quit! It feels like learning to Crochet all over again.
The rest of the week has been really relaxed, i keep getting nasty bugs in my kitchen so I’ve had to order some spray, powder and bombs and i don’t know why i haven’t managed to get round to doing it yet but need to keep the cat away, but i have actually sprayed some tonight and went in the kitchen and i think it lured them out and found about 7 dead. SO it means that the stuff works, and i think i will be bug free.
I am hoping in the next few months that i will move in to a house soon, i can’t stand it in this flat. Its old, the rent is sky high, i am behind on rent from last year so still trying to pay it off. The struggles are real! I do think sometimes life is one big test but i guess i am thankful that i do have a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food on the table. Whether we feel as though we aren’t privileged, we actually are.
I’ve also finished season 4 of Bates Motel, i have also just started to watch Happy Valley, which i know the first season of that started a while back my mum has been pestering me to watch it.
You see why i am doing a weekly diary? I have no life since losing my job, i can’t even give you an exciting week. I will continue this, because it’s helping me a lot to get less anxious about things and it feels good to write… Which brings me to the Story time tab at the top of this blog. I’m working on something, not sure what is! It could be the start of something as draft for a novel, or a series of short stories that sort of connect as one. I’ve been writing, drafting, deleting and starting all over.
Thanks for reading if you did, i hope this week will be more exciting. Unlikely as the weather is super rubbish. Happy Tuesday!